Letter to Self

March 25th, 2020

I used to laugh when somebody said, “The criteria for my life partner is the one who matches my life values.” The only things crossing my mind when I heard that were:

1. What does life values even mean? How do you get or know something like that?
2. How do you know if someone has the same values or not?
3. How do two different people have exactly the same value?

It didn’t sound plausible at the time. Well, what do I know? I was 21 when I heard that for the first time. Yet, now, I find myself saying that over and over again.

Life Values

Since “life values” are such big words, the easiest to put it is to complete the sentence below:

I value my life by …

The completion of the sentence above for me would be:

I value my life by spending time only with people whom I love and doing only the things I’m passionate about in the lane of my purpose.

It sounds quite general and you might be thinking, “Isn’t that everyone’s life values?” Well, you’d be surprised.

Most people would say: making achievement, being successful, make someone proud, or appreciating what they have.

I’m not saying that there’s right or wrong answer. There isn’t.

How you value your life sums up how you want to spend the rest of your life doing. If you want to find a life partner, that means you’ll spend the rest of your life doing that with them.

If that doesn’t align, I’m not sure how the relationship would work. Of course, relationship is a sacrifice. That is if relationship is your priority. If not, then, you’ll have to find a partner with the same life values so that neither of you needs to compromise. Or else, the relationship itself might be the one to be compromised.

I know that would be the case for me.

If I’m willing to elaborate:

1. Spending time only with people whom I love; my family, friends, pets, and people included in number 2.
2. Doing only the things I’m passionate about in the lane of my purpose; self growth, support unfortunate children to dream, support the needs for food, clothes, and roof for the below-poverty-line, income stability, and pet insurance.

I want to spend the rest of my life doing those points and I’m not willing to sacrifice it for anything else. At least, nothing that I could think of at the moment.

Of course I want to get married someday and it worries me sometimes that I wouldn’t find anyone who would understand and support my life values. But I can’t. I can’t imagine my life without my values. Nothing is worth more to me than those.